My Husband Is 14 Years Older Than Me, Died 14 Years After Our Marriage – Abiodun Duro-Ladipo

Abiodun Duro-Ladipo

Mrs. Abiodun Duro-Ladipo, popularly known as Moremi or Oya, wife of the late Yoruba ace dramatist, Duro Ladipo, in this interview with YEMI OJELEYE, speaks on why she remained unmarried, 31 years after the death of her husband, life after his death, her career, among other issues. Excerpts:

Childhood.
I am a princess and the first child of my parents; born
on December 25 at Ikun-Epe Ekiti, Ekiti State, my parents’ home town. I am from a polygamous family and my mother is the first wife of my father.

How was the experience like growing up?
It was interesting and educative. In those days, we would trek as far as four miles everyday from Ikun-Epe to school at Ijero. Before it was eight o’clock in the morning, we would have arrived Ijero, joining others on the assembly ground. In those days, you must not be late to school and any latecomer would be flogged not minding the long tiring walk which was enough to make a child sleep in class.

Can you compare that time with the present day education?
No! Students attitude to education, these days, makes me laugh. Some cannot even walk a short distance to their schools, unless they ride on either a motorcycle or cab.

Talk more about your education.
I attended modern school for three years, which was equivalent to the present day polytechnic and later went to Akure for a year vocational training at Women Training School owned by the Whites.

What form of vocational training did you receive?
We were taught house craft, laundry, dress making and fashion designing. It was very useful when I got married especially, sewing our costumes. Also, I had no business with any tailor sewing my husband’s and my children’s dresses.

What other advantages did you derive from the vocational training?
There’s no knowledge lost. I attended the Women Training School not knowing it would be of a great advantage to me later both in my career and home.

Will you have been fulfilled being a nurse than a theatre artiste?
I feel fulfilled being an artiste. Though Nursing was my initial vision, but because God wanted to use me to help my husband, I had to join him in his profession. When I met him, he told me everything about his life and felt I could help him. That was why I dropped Nursing for my husband.

As a youth, did you dream of becoming an artiste?
No. I dreamt of becoming a nurse. At a time, I went to live with my sister in Osogbo, purposely to sit for an entrance examination into School of Mid-wifery, Ado-Ekiti; but there, I met my husband.

Your husband was an artiste, how were you able to fit into his chosen career?
It was because I also love singing.

Will you say meeting your husband while staying with your sister was God’s arrangement?
Yes. All I can say is that God is a perfect planner. We got married in 1964, though we’ve been working together before I agreed to marry him. Thank God our marriage is blessed with both male and female children.


Late Duro Ladipo and Abiodun
on their wedding day.Did your parent agree to the step you took?
Ha! There were uproars as regards that. I was seen as an unserious person for opting to join a dancing group. I was labelled lazybones. It got so bad that even on stage, whenever light went off, people would say we harassed one another. My parents were not happy with me, almost regretted my going to Osogbo. But in spite of the opposition, I assured my parents there was no cause for alarm.

Was there anything in particular that attracted you to your husband?
Nothing! When I met him, he had nothing; but all I can say is that God brought us together.

Now, as a famous actress, if you are to choose between money and fame, which one will you choose?
I will choose fame. A Yoruba adage says “if you’re in search of money, and you meet fame on the way, you should go back because if you have the money, you will use it to buy fame.” I did not regret being married to my husband; though he was wealthy and famous. Everywhere I get to, I’m honoured.

Say something about your husband.
My husband is 14 years older than me. He was a tolerant man who took me as his sister. He was also gentle.

When did he die?
He died in 1978 when our marriage was just 14 years old.

Why did you decide to remain single all this while?
After my husband’s death, I asked God if I should pray for a new husband, but he told me to sit down in my husband’s house. Though there were storms, God saw me through. I did not allow anybody to shatter my life with material things. Someone even tried to ruin my life by offering to take me abroad to marry him. I turned him down with his wealth.

Did you make any mistake as a youth?
No. What I could have considered a mistake was when I left a man to marry my husband, but it turned out to be a blessing.

What are the challenges you faced as a youth?
There were other men who wanted a relationship with me; even as a young married woman when my husband was still alive. When he died, if not for the fact that I stood my ground, I would have left my husband’s house. People said a lot of things about me, but I didn’t give a damn.

Did you play any prank as a youth?
No. I was very gentle and simple. These are the qualities my husband saw in me that attracted me to him. Even up till now, I remain myself.

Do you have any of your children who has interest in acting as a profession and has taken it up?
Yes. My last born is a lover of the profession, and he has a group.

What are the things that helped you achieve this feat?
I thank God for helping me thus far. One thing I know is that if a man has faith in God, everything is possible for him. I’ve been content with all that I have since my youthful days. I always say that if any man brings money to entice me, he should go with his money.” What shall it profit a man if he gains the whole world and loses his soul?” With what will it exchange it? Nothing!

What is your advice for the youth?
They, especially the married, should not have friends aside their spouses. The youth should be watchful of every step they take. They should not think evil of another person.