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How would I forgive a deceitful husband?(II)
Thursday, 26 August 2010
Dear Taiwo,
I was not convinced by his excuse, but I had no other proof to nail him so I forgot about it, but deep down in my mind I knew something was wrong somewhere.
Dele had to move to Abuja, when he got a new contract, I couldn't go with him because I didnt want to lose my job, I did not want a situation of leaving certainty for uncertainty. Initially, he insisted that I resign to go with him; but I pleaded with him to see reasons with me, he grudgingly agreed and we both decided to work out our programmes in such a way that when he was not down south, I would be with him.
This arrangement eventually became a saving grace and an issue of mixed blessings for me. Because if I had resigned from my office and gone to Abuja with him and he eventually showed me his true self, I would have been devastated, but thank God I still have my job and happiness.
His stay in Abuja gave him enough time to be on top of the situation in his three homes, the first one is where his kids and sister live, mine and the other woman's. Honestly, I give it to him, Dele really is a super human, because it would take a man with something extra to keep three different homes.
Sometimes, when I was supposed to travel to see him in Abuja, he would tell me he had to make a trip out of town. I never questioned him because I trusted him.
The first major issue I had with him was when I needed him to go with me to see a gynaecologist.
Naturally, I desired to have another child. I tried getting pregnant but couldn't, so I had to see a doctor. After series of tests, I was given a clean bill of health, the doctor said nothing was wrong with me, he then asked to see my husband.
I called Dele and told him, it was a private hospital and he could see the doctor during the weekend.
He consented and promised to go with me. When he came I reminded him, he gave me excuse. For about two months I kept asking him to come with me to see the doctor, I was shocked when he said that, I should tell my doctor to find out what was wrong with me, as he was medically fit to father a child.
I was shocked. His words and attitude led to a quarrel, which was our major quarrel. He eventually did not see the doctor and I did all I could even spiritually to concieve, but Dele did not help me.
There was a particular time we were supposed to fast together and pray, he was on leave, we agreed to do this; you wont believe that Dele pretended as if he was fasting but ate as soon as I left for the office. We were supposed to fast for three days, on the second day, our housemaid told me that daddy ate. I did not believe her, I eventually confronted him and he could not deny.
Thank God I hadn't a child for him because if I had a child, leaving him would not be easy. Sometime ago, when I visited him in Abuja, his houseboy told me that I should make my visit more frequent because a lady used to come and stay with oga whenever I wasn't around. I diplomatically confronted him with this, but he denied vehemently.
I did not make an issue of it but decided to find out by myself by paying him a visit during the week. Can you believe that I caught Dele red-handed.
I left Lagos with the last flight and when I arrived Abuja, I did not call him or go to his office because he normally closed late. I took a taxi directly to the house. I had my own keys so I needed no one before I would go in. Lo and behold, I didn't need a key, I met a lady in the house. She was comfortable and even asked who I was.
I introduced myself to her and she was shocked.
She had never met me and vice versa, but I saw her photograph on Dele's phone and camera at a party, but he told me she was a friend's wife and that she was eager to meet me.
I asked her about her husband, but she was shocked. I never knew how Dele got to know I was around because he rushed in and demanded to know why I came without informing him.
I was mad at him and we had another quarrel. The lady left that night but I refused to share his bed or even drink water, till I left very early the following day.
This was however a minor issue compared with why I decided to part ways with him.
He was also fond of taking, or should I say stealing my money. Whenever he admit he took it; around, he was always picking my money. Sometimes he would agree to taking it, other times he would deny.
He also had the habit of accusing me of infidelity.
( To be concluded next week)
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